New Lunchbox, check. Lunchable and gummies, check. Tissues, crayons, paper and scissors (not the pointy kind but just the right scissors),check. Book bag so full of supplies that my little one is about to fall over backwards, check! The doors opened, teachers and staff were greeting the masses, as kids returned for a new school year. “Bye Mama", was the reply from my 2nd grader, as he made his way to his classroom, all by himself. Well, he was a pro he said. He had been doing this for 2 years. Hand in hand, my 5 year old and I walked down that seemingly unending hallway and arrived at his new kindergarten classroom. As I knelt down to be able to look into his little face, I held his cheeks in my hands and said, “ I love you buddy. I hope you have a great first day. I’ll be praying for you. Have fun!” He hugged me tight. I kissed him on the cheek and walked away praying that God would guide and protect him as he started this new adventure. Fast forward 13 years, and we have a new backpack, money instead of lunchables, (because ChicFila is a must)and supplies and clothes, but this time it’s my car that’s extremely full. His brother, waiting for him in Missouri, says "Mom, we’ve got this, I’ve got him covered." He grabs his last few things and begins to walk down the driveway. His Dad gets in the car to head off to his freshman year of college. I grab his hand and follow him to the car. This time I no longer have to kneel, he has to bend down to me. I grab his face and tell him I love him and how proud I am of him. I’m praying for you, buddy. I can’t wait to see what God has planned for you. He hugged me tight, “I love you Mom, I’ll see you soon.” As my feet hit the sidewalk, and I made my way back to the house, memories of the last 13 years began to flood my mind. Birthday parties, school events, nerf gun fights, boy inventions, lego creations, precious moments of being able to do worship with my boys and not only those precious moments but also “all those not so “A game” mama moments.” I began to think of the times that my patience was not so “fruit of the spirit”, and my response to him in a situation may not have been “a gently quiet spirit “ to say the least. Those moments ,that as a Mom, where I felt,”Proverbs 31”ish”, began to resonate in my mind. I made my way to my chair, grabbed my freshly brewed cup of coffee and began to talk to God. God, forgive me for those moments that I leaned more on my emotion than you. Forgive me for worrying, insead of trusting, for stressing instead of resting. Forgive me for the times that I was not the best steward of the gifts (my children) you have given me. In that moment of feeling as though I had failed Him many times, God spoke so clearly to me. “Wendy, when you are weak, I am strong. When you fail, I am there to help correct your wrongs. My Grace is sufficient.” I was reminded of this scripture… Romans 5:20-21 20 Moreover the law entered, that the offence might abound. But where sin abounded, grace did much more abound: 21 That as sin hath reigned unto death, even so might grace reign through righteousness unto eternal life by Jesus Christ our Lord. On those “Proverbs 31”ish”” Days, God reminded me that his grace was not only sufficient for me but for my children as well. His grace not only covers me but also covers them. I have watched as five little boys are growing into young men and am overwhelmed at the faithfulness of God in my family. Does that mean I always get it right, certainly not! Does that mean that I am allowing God to transform me to be more like him so that my words are life, my attitude is loving, my responses are kind, and my fruit of the spirit are in full production, yes it does! Don’t allow grace to be your crutch, allow grace to be your reminder. A reminder that we are not perfect but that we are growing in His likeness. We can only become more like Him when we are with Him. Allow grace to reroute you when you are drifting from Him. So on those days when you feeling more “Proverbs 31”ish”” than Proverbs 31, know that God is not finished with you yet. Cling to him. Walk with Him. He will show you great and mighty things. His grace is sufficient. Be humble and allow God to shape you and grow you. The journey will be AMAZING!!!
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